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In their piece in the New York Times Eastwick and Hunt write: For one of our studies, we recruited 129 heterosexual individuals across several small undergraduate classes.These individuals indicated, at both the beginning and the end of the semester, the extent to which the opposite-sex students in their class possessed a set of desirable qualities.There’s a lot of debate about building attraction when it comes to dating.One of the perennial debates is whether looks make a bigger difference than, say, one’s personality. Star Trek debates as both sides try to convince the rest of the world that the other are shallow homonculi or people deluding themselves about their chances. It’s a generally accepted truth that people who are conventionally physically attractive have an advantage when it comes to dating.We found that consensus dropped and uniqueness increased as these students got to know one another over time.After three months, uniqueness dominated consensus for all desirable qualities: attractiveness, vitality, warmth, potential for success and even the ability to provide a satisfying romantic relationship.
If you’re not blessed with Tyson Beckford’s smile, Ryan Gosling’s dreamy eyes and Brad Pitt’s abs, you may as well just hope to find someone who’s willing to put up with you in order to avoid a life of desperate loneliness, right? While being stunningly good looking helps with than appearance.If someone finds you kind of annoying, repeated exposure only serves to reinforce this.If someone things you’re cool however, getting to know you over time, building attraction, makes them much more likely to be interested.So if you’re not the best looking man around, let’s talk a little about how one goes about building attraction over time.In evo-psych circles, a lot is made out of one’s “mating value” : that is, the aspects of attraction which are intrinsically based on certain favorable traits.
Some, like financial success or social status, help ensure that any child will be raised successfully to adulthood.